Below are some of the interviews from DIFFERENT
LOVING to give you a sense of the individuals who spoke to
us about the kinks and fetishes nearest and dearest to their hearts.
Interviewees for DIFFERENT
LOVING were solicited in a number of ways. We mass-mailed
support groups and leather clubs throughout North America with
a full description of our project and asked
for volunteers. We used our personal network of contacts in the
Scene in New York; Los Angeles; Chicago; San Francisco; Washington,
D.C.; and Atlanta. We solicited volunteers through on-line
services. Word spread sufficiently throughout the Scene that
volunteers began to contact us.
Roughly 150 in-depth interviews were recorded,
providing us with 250 hours of taped material. Approximately 95
women and men were selected for inclusion in the book. The interviews
uploaded here derive from our original manuscript: in some cases,
they are longer than those which appear in the book, or they unite
material which was distributed throughout the text.
A positive look into power relationships,
SM, and related fetishes and orientations.
to be published by Villard (a division of Random House) in 1992-'93,
is a comprehensive, humanistic, and positive look at power relationships,
domination/submission (D&S) and sado/masochism (SM), and all
the fetishes and orientations which are commonly associated with
power relationships. The authors (Gloria and Will Brame and Jon
Jacobs) are committed to writing a book which depicts such interests
as both an acceptable expression of sexuality and a matter of
devotes separate chapters to specific interests (e.g., body modification,
corporal punishment, spanking, bondage, water sports, infantilism,
transgenderism, leather/latex, fetishes, etc.). In addition to
a general overview for each, there will be extensive interviews
with real people. There are two categories of interviewees:
(1) people who wish to use their full names (real or Scene names)
and (2) anonymous private practitioners (gay, straight, bi, top,
bottom, switch). [PLEASE NOTE: all interviewees are requested
to sign releases, for their legal protection and our own.]
We also include comments from sympathetic doctors and psychologists.
The book emphasizes the importance of safe, sane, and mutually
The tone of the book is simply: "these
alleged deviations aren't nearly as extraordinary as you think,
and folks who like this stuff are normal, upright, kind, caring
people, just like anyone else." We are not just writing this
for other D&S'ers, but for the mainstream audience which is
generally bombarded with negative and extremely misleading information
about alternative sexuality. We feel confident that far more people
practice or fantasize about some kind of variation than has ever
been publicly acknowledged.
The publisher is progressive and committed
to this project; he intends to market it as widely as possible.
He has promised to support the book with a national promotional
tour and talk-show appearences. We are hopeful that, among other
things, this book will not only bring out positive information
about the various alternative sexuality communities but that
it will also bring some money into the communities--the
publisher is open to advertising and distribution through the
sources we will recommend. All in all, we are hoping that many
good things will come of this project. But our first priority
is simply to spread some good information (for a change) about
We welcome contacts from any and all who are
sincerely interested in helping us make this project successful--and
accurate! For further information you can call me at my home [contact
information deleted]. If you are interested in being interviewed,
please call Jon Jacobs directly (he will be conducting
all interviews) at [contact information deleted].
Recently Gloria asked you if you would be
willing to be an interview subject for our book-in-progress, tentatively
titled Different Loving. You replied in the affirmative,
and I would now like to schedule your interview.
Interviews will be done over the phone and
will be recorded. **You will be referred to using a pseudonym
in the book; we guarantee your anonymity.**
General areas to be discussed in the interview
will include the following:
Your sexual orientation and its place
in your life
Your view on how you developed your
Your most intense experiences in terms
of your sexuality
Your most compelling or exciting fantasies
Whether you feel that you're at your
If possible, I would like to do your interview
between June 21 and July 20. Daytime interviews are preferable,
but I will, of course, be happy to schedule at any time that is
convenient to you.
Your cooperation in this project is immensely
appreciated. We cannot present the subject at hand in an honest
and human light without the openness and cooperation of you and
the other participants whom we will be interviewing. I'm looking
forward to hearing from you as soon as possible. Please accept
my thanks--and those of Gloria and Will--in advance.